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To the person who has been to ‘The Sunken Place’,

Some days are great, and you forget all your problems.  Some days are good, not perfect but you still feel blessed.  Some days are just okay.  Then there are days when you want the ground to swallow you up and make you disappear. 

The smallest thing can make you upset or irritated and you tell yourself not to worry or stress about it.  Then suddenly, all sorts of negative thoughts take over your mind and they are all you can think about.  You feel like you are drowning and no one can tell.  Sometimes people tell you ‘you’re just in a bad mood’, ‘you’re too sensitive’ or the one I hate the most ‘get over it’.  Personally, I don’t think anyone who tells you things like these can help you.  So, try your best to ignore them.

Perhaps, you know you have things to do but you don’t care enough to do them.  You know you might need some real help coping with the chaos of life, but you don’t want to talk to a professional because that is intimidating and makes your situation real.  You don’t want to talk to your family because you don’t feel like they are good at talking about their problems or maybe they don’t listen to you.  You believe you can’t tell your friends because they will judge you or treat you differently.  Well, let me ask you this, has dealing with everything yourself worked out so far?  If the answer is not a definite yes, then you need to find at least one person to confide in. 

I am someone who hates having to ask people for help, but it is something that I am working on.  You need to find at least one person who you can consider ‘your person’.  You don’t have to tell them everything because I know sometimes you can’t even process what is happening, and you feel like you can’t put it all into words.  Try telling them that you are having a bad day and you don’t know why.  Let them know you don’t want to feel down anymore.  This will help you feel less like you are drowning because you will feel loved. 

Not to contradict myself, but you also have to be willing to leave the sunken place.  No one can make that decision apart from you.  The sunken place knows exactly how to trap you, but you are the one who can find the best way for you to escape it.

If I had a magic formula to erase the negativity I would.  The journey of overcoming the darkness is one that you have to make, but you can choose not to do it alone.  I am sure there are people in your life who you support through all their troubles and they are (hopefully) grateful for it.  So, why can’t you find someone as caring as yourself to lean on?  I am guessing you are afraid to trust people… Trusting others is something you have to learn if you want to thrive in various human relationships you have.

I am young and I don’t know everything.  However, I do know that when I am going through bad days, I walk away from them more easily when I have others to hold my hand and go on the journey with me. 

I hope you make whatever changes you need to and don’t let the sunken place continue to trap you.

From Someone Who Cares

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